Lately I’ve been tired…really tired.
In the few months that have passed I have travelled overseas, tried to deal with the loss of my grandfather, gotten a promotion at work, finished a draft of my MS and started editing it, and made a commitment to myself that I would give this writing thing a red hot go. This is on top of the daily grind which includes work, exercise (personal training, aerobics or yoga 5+ times per week), trying to keep my house from looking like a bomb site feeding my husband (he’s a fabulous cook but gives no regard to nutrition, hence I cook during the week) and supporting him while he goes through a rough time at work.
As I said, really tired.
When I woke up the other morning I was so tired in fact that I had the urge to cry for no other reason than I just wanted to go back to sleep. Not really healthy if I think about it rationally.
I guess all writers go through this in varied frequencies during their journey to publication and beyond. Before you’re published it’s all about balancing a job or family (or both) whilst learning and writing. Then you get published and you have the added pressures of deadlines, managing marketing and social media, networking etc.
Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t trade writing for the world. It gives me an immense amount of pleasure…but sometimes one needs to take a step back and take some time out. For me that’s taking a few days off, chilling on the couch watching Mad Men and going to bed embarrassingly early.
My relaxation of choice
I felt it important to raise this topic in the hope that other writerly folks might see it and cut themselves some slack. We’re all human and we can’t be finely tuned writing machines without the appropriate amount of down time. Giving your mind and body a break could mean that an idea that has been distorted by sleep deprivation suddenly becomes clear, or a solution to your current problem materialises itself after a good night’s sleep.
Be kind to yourself.
How do you like to unwind from writing and life?
Losing a loved one is never easy, losing someone that had a great influence on you is tragic. My grandfather was both of those things and more – he was a comedian, the voice of reason, a story teller, traveller and lover of life.
I have been throwing myself into my work over the past week in an effort to try and get through the grief, I’m pouring my heart and soul into my writing in the hopes that his influence on me will never be wasted. I want to be successful to honour all that he taught me, for all the times he pushed me and told me to work harder.
Rest in peace
I’ve been very quiet on the blogging front for the last few weeks – this is because I’ve been dealing with the slow decline of my grandfather’s heath. Currently he’s in hospital suffering with cancer, an pneumonia and a perforated bowl. He’s too sick to be operated on. He is dying.
The feeling of helplessness I have is overwhelming and all-consuming. No matter how hard I wish, no matter how hard I pray he is going to be leaving my family soon.
Writing is the only thing keeping me going at the moment, the ability to delve into my character’s world and absorb myself in their problems while escaping from my own is what’s keeping me sane right now. Am I sticking my head in the sand? Perhaps. I know what’s coming and I know it will be hard, but for now I feel best when I’m away from my world and playing in someone else’s.
Just a quick note to say that I’ll be heading off on holidays tomorrow! I’m trading Melbourne dry heat for Singapore humidity, and will be spending two fabulous weeks with my husband and our close friends who live there at the moment.
I’m so excited as I’ve never been to Asia before, so I plan to sample all that Singapore has to offer in terms of food, shopping and the night-life. I’m going to take the opportunity to catch up on some reading (perfect for passing the time on the flight and for lounging by the pool) and have I have a few ideas swimming around in my head which I want to plot out for future works.
Here’s what I’ll be reading on the plane…
I’ve been wanting to start the ‘in death’ series for ages!
I hope you all have a fantastic start to 2013, and I’ll be see you in the new year.